Introduction: F*ck, this was a busy movie weekend. I actually can't believe how much time I spent sitting down in a theater burning my eyes out. So I decided to do another trifecta on movies. But before I start I just have to say this; go see Cabin in the Woods. It's an amazing movie that I keep hearing people say is like Hunger Games. IT IS NOT LIKE HG. That movie was a simple post-apocalyptic story. This is something completely different and I reallllly don't want to give it away because it's THAT good. See it. Now back to our reviews!
Lockout: You know how when you watch a movie and it reminds you of another movie? Except it might not be good? Well I'm here to teach you about The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly! The Good are movies that really channel the energy of another movie by either giving you the same feeling or even paying homage to it. Examples of this include The Artist, The Raid, and the Star Wars original trilogy. The Bad are films that remind you of another movie because it so blatantly ripped it off such as the Star Wars prequel trilogy and Green Lantern. The Ugly are those movies that remind you of every other movie in that genre. They are literally indistinguishable from each other. Examples of this include every romantic comedy and horror film. Lockout is Ugly as it does nothing to be unique. All I remember from it was that it was exactly the same as Escape from New York except without being good.
Blue Like Jazz: I remember chatting with a friend about a movie called No Country For Old Men. I didn't like it. It built up tension well but it had no story, characters, or pay off. The person tried to defend this argument by saying that's what the book was like. This. Is not. A valid. Argument. That's how I feel about Blue Like Jazz. People will defend it by saying that's how the book was. The movie is boring, the main character was an ass, their is nothing at stake, and I just plain ole didn't give a sh*t about anything that happened. I'm sure the book was great...for post-Modern Christians.
Cabin in the Woods: The brilliance of this movie is that it is both the Good and the Ugly. It's Good in that it channels such films as Evil Dead 2, Scream, and Galaxy Quest, but also Ugly in that the main thing about it is that it's just like every other horror movie out there. And that's what's brilliant about it. It actually takes the structure of every horror movie ever made and just breaks it down in front of your eyes. Without giving too much away the movie is about a company manipulating events of an average camping trip for some teens into a B story horror film that we all have seen thousands of times to make a movie that is scary as well as hysterical on so many levels.
Conclusion: My conclusion is simple. Go See. Cabin in the Woods. Do. Not. See. Lockout. Maybe. See. Blue Like Jazz. I'M OUT, B*TCHES!!!
